She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
