on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
