this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
