Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
