it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
