I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
