Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
i dont even know how to be here
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
