So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
