i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
