I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
