Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
