I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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