forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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