It's Friday. Sex?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
