How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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