so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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