She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize