Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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