Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
