i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize