I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Randomize
