We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
