no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize