i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
You peed on a flamingo?!?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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