PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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