so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Be still, my beating vagina.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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