and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
