Will you blow on my dice?
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
