i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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