You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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