I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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