in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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