my vag is so smooth its legendary
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
