there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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