Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Pants 0. Shit 1.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
