so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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