i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
