My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
