god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
