Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
