Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize