walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
