Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
