Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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