Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
The adults are the big ones right?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
