"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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