wat bout pragnant strippers??
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Randomize
