I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
