I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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