The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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