Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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